You're sitting right next to me!

New person in the office. New person on my team. They sit 5 seats away. Why have I gotten 5 emails today with irrelevant statements such as "Great OK!" and "Thanks!"??

Get off your lazy ass, walk over to my desk which you could throw a stick at and say "Thanks!" in person so that I don't think you're a useless lazy ass and lose the motivation to ever share anything with you again!! Losers.

I drank enough caffeine today to keep me awake for the next 8 hours. So naturally I have to go home and get rid of the high by drinking Robitussin Cough and Cold Night time formula. My medicine induced sleep cycles are the best.

For lunch I ate weird romaine lettuce hearts with raw mushrooms and thought to myself "I'd rather be eating Chicken and Mushroom Marsala." No, not MASALA. "Marsala." I know what you desis were thinking.

I wore a black sleeveless sweater on top of my striped collard shirt today and my Office BFF called it a "sweater beater." haha

I had a dream that there was a man I loved and then he made me very sad then when I dropped a single tear, he shrugged his shoulders and walked away. In reality if this happens, I'll surely cleat him in the throat. Sala.

I'm paying $50 a month for satellite cable and my renter uses it to watch Dancing with the Stars night after night. I think I'll disconnect it and let her just watch static for the next 90 days until someone decides to chip in. Plus I hate Dancing with the Stars. Half of them are ex-dance video making boy-band dropouts anyway. Gee, as if you didn't have enough practice sharpening THAT talent.

The Dow Jones industrial average closed above 10,000 for the first time in a year. I'm still mad at Lucent Technologies for turning into Alcoa and costing me my Giuseppe Zanottis. Dot-com bursting whores.

Today's blog is a sampling of random thoughts of the day. Unorganized, unfiltered, unadulterated.

Columbus and Discoveries

You know, Christopher Columbus never even stepped foot on the Americas. They didn't even see the continent of North America. But he still gets credit. How sad.
Do you know what Christopher Columbus is responsible for bringing back to his people? Syphilis.
Yea...syphilis. Because of his dirty army, 5 million people died after his little troop de Nina, Pinta and Santa Maria came back to Italy joined the army and went to war with the Europeans. Nothing but trouble they are.
So thinking about Christopher Columbus' incorrect discovery of The Bahamas got me thinking? What have I discovered? What do I find out correctly and incorrectly each day? Most days I find that the project team I work with can't seem to keep their eyes on the prize and need constant pushing to get the smallest of tasks done. Other days I find that my body can lift more than I thought, run farther than I noticed, or do more crunches than the day before.
I did a little discovering this weekend too. I discovered the following:
1) The Giants have an awesome player named Ahmad Bradshaw and while the world (including his mom) may call him Ah-mawd...I'm still referring to him as Eh-mud.
2) Sausage and peppers in hoagie buns are not very tasty but chili with cheese is.
3) Take everything at face value and don't put the cart before the horse
4) Chilli chicken will always be my favorite halal Chinese dish
5) Never order from gourmegiftbaskets.com because the objects in person are smaller than they appear from the website
6) Outlet mall shopping takes about 14 hours to fully complete
7) Tights are the best things ever!
8) Nobody does fried food like they do in the south!!!!!! NOBODY!
9) I will hold having to pee for 8 hours, but I will NOT...repeat NOT use a Port-a-Jon. (ever)
10) I won't do #9 even if there are lysol, baby wipes and hand sanitizing gel abound.
11) Chopped street meet is pretty frickin delicious.
12) Not having Crumbs makes me pretty sad.

At the risk of having unlucky number 13, I think I'll stop there. I seemed to have learned quite a lot. Most of which I'll never use in my lifetime but for remembrance tidbits but hey-- at least now I know. Even if its not what you want to hear, hey, at least now you know. And knowing boys and girls, if half the battle.

MaddyQ out.

Now here's where the fun begins! Have you got jiggly arms? Are you a man who desires to have a chest bigger than your woman's? Are you dying to have a strapping, bulging, maaaasive upper body that looks like you juice on the regular? Well, now there's the revolutionary SHAKE WEIGHT!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpXPCJUC2Kw

Oh man....where do they come up with this stuff?
Now to seriously talk about what my fitness routine looked like this week...here we go.
Sunday was a 45 minute uphill climb on the treadmill at level 30 (max) after which I was completely soaked and could barely feel the back of my thighs. Followed by that was a small prognosis of abs which was probably didn't do anything burn off the apple I ate before I got to the gym.
Monday was my usual athletic conditioning class which is an hour of extreme cardio combined with interval weight training. I like to call this class "I can't believe I put myself through this torture" class!
I planned on taking it easy Tuesday by stepmilling and rowing for a quick 30 minutes but then I forgot my ipod charger and had to go back home. But then when my ipod got juiced back up (no, it didn't do reps with the Shake Weight!), I felt like going for a short jog which turned into a record breaking 6 mile run...whoo-whoo!
I woke up Wednesday feelin pretty good so I went back to another athletic conditioning class with "Bryan the Body" as I like to call him. Craziness? Indeed...
Woke up Thursday and couldn't feel my butt anymore. And trust me, with a butt this big, it take ALOT to stop feeling it. I vowed not to do any more legs so I went to a total body strengthening class....where the teacher ended up focusing on...guess what?? More effing legs! They have it out for me I swear!
Bad choices all week and then a spin class with Alan the Angry A$$ Kicker...ouch, ouch, ouch...got off the bike, wobbled toward the cleaning cloths to spray it down and realized that now I can't feel the back of my legs, my butt OR my calves! I'm walking around like an old woman with osteoporosis because every single tendon and fiber in my muscles are in so much pain...I only have enough energy to sit in front of the Ellen Degeneres show and watch her make fun of the Shake Weight!